I came to life coaching looking for someone to give me the answer. I wanted to feel better, have less anxiety, work out a direction in life and stop wallowing around saying ‘I don’t know’.
And coaching gave me that answer
But like all things in life it wasn’t quite the answer I was expecting.
I learnt that I already had the power to feel better, reduce my anxiety and to find a direction.
That might sound really cheesey and if I were reading this I’d probably be rolling my eyes right now.
But I learnt that I really could choose what I focused my attention on.
I learnt that the negative thoughts that came into my head would always come, but I could choose to acknowledge them and then choose to focus on some nicer, healthier, more positive thoughts instead.
I learnt that these thoughts were optional.
I didn’t learn that overnight or from reading one blog post or listening to one podcast. Rather, I put this into ACTION.
I DELIBERATELY experimented with this concept to test for myself. I made a plan of how I would introduce more positive thoughts into my brain in a very deliberate way.
I made a choice to thank my brain for warning me with negative thoughts and then made a choice to move on from those thoughts.
This didn’t always work and didn’t change everything overnight. I, of course, still get anxious, still have negative thoughts. But the overall balance is so much better. Even just knowing I have a choice makes me feel so much better.
It does take effort to train your brain to focus on the positive as much as, or more than, the negative:
- Understand you have a choice about what your brain focuses on
- Start really beginning to notice your thoughts and acknowledge them as ‘thoughts’ and not simply ‘truths’
- Thank your brain for sending you negative thoughts, then move on
- Deliberately spend time focusing on positive thoughts
- Keep practicing, it won’t happen overnight,
You have to put the effort into training your brain. If you are committed to doing that and understand that there will always be a balance of positive and negative then you really can start making your life into the one you’ve always dreamed of.